So many of the conversations in my life recently have come down to respect. It's an interesting concept. The dictionary gives several different definitions for the verb "to respect":
1. To hold in esteem or honor
2. To show regard or consideration for
3. To refrain from intruding upon or interfering with
4. To relate or have reference to
Here's where I think I stand on respect overall. Every single human on this planet deserves, for the sole reason that they are in fact a human being, to be considered and afforded basic rights and necessities as a human. I think that is a form of respect that is a natural right to every human regardless of any factors. I think that beyond that, the definition of respect and where it is due has gotten skewed recently.
Opinions do not have to be respected. "You have to respect my opinion." No, no I do not. If your opinion is completely idiotic, founded in no evidence or research, or just completely wrong but you insist on holding it anyway, I don't think that it deserves respect. For instance:
"Let's build a wall on the border with Mexico to keep out rapists and thieves and drugs."
That sentence does not deserve respect. It is not an opinion that I have to consider. It is not one founded in evidence (that putting up a wall would do any of those things), and it is racist at it's core. It is not for the betterment of humanity, and it does not deserve respect.
One that would deserve consideration (while I don't know it to be true, but am using as an example):
"Tougher border policies statistically contribute to less drugs entering the country illegally, so I think we should have tougher border policies."
I can have a discussion about that! It's an opinion, and while I have a right to refute it, it's one that can be considered because you thought about it once or twice before you asserted it. Supposedly, you didn't just make it up.
You see, I think respect is a word that has a lot of meanings, as shown above, but that many folks have taken to mean only one thing. I think people bundle up all four of those definitions into one over arching term of respect, and say that everyone deserves it. Certain things deserve to be held in esteem or honor, and some don't. Certain things deserve to be regarded or considered. Certain things deserve to be referenced. Others do not. That respect is different than the one that each human I believe deserves on account of being human.
Here's where we really get into muddy waters. Religion. For some reason, our society has decided that all religions, just by nature of calling themselves religions, deserve a disproportionate amount of respect. "Feel free to have a political discussion for hours and yell at each other, but my religion deserves respect!" I completely disagree. If the church says that gay people shouldn't be able to get married on the basis of scripture, to me that isn't a valid argument. If the church says contraception is prohibited on the basis of scripture (to be clear, that isn't really in scripture, just like the trinity isn't, and the virgin birth is in 2/4 gospels), it's not a valid argument. Just because religion says something doesn't mean it deserves respect. Atheism or agnosticism aren't considered religions (despite producing great people who are deep thinkers and moral beacons), thus, in the eyes of many, those folks don't deserve to have their opinions respected. The two way street is hard to come by sometimes.
Additionally, belief in religion is in fact an opinion, and we require folks to be able to defend most opinions they give nowadays. You like Hillary more than Ben Carson? Why? You like Dominos more than Pizza Hut? Why? But you believe in Islam over Christianity, or Catholicism over Hinduism? We're not allowed to ask why. Religion is religion, and it's a protected opinion in our society for some reason. I don't understand why the question of why you believe what you believe is a taboo question, and why people have trouble answering it. It's arguably the most important opinion to a lot of peoples' hearts, but they can't defend it if asked to.
Opinions don't deserve respect inherently like humans do. They're human-made, and thus subject to error. My friend Sam said today in the office, "If opinions have caused people to be lynched, why do they deserve respect? They threaten lives at a certain point."
"You have to respect my opinion," is not something I will ever ascribe to. I know it puts me in muddy waters with what opinions deserve respect, but I think it's fair to say that if it's defensible with logic, reason, or in general any sort of useful defense, perhaps it deserves to be considered. Is it counter to the betterment of humanity? Is it racist, sexist, meant to divide in any way? Why should I respect it?
I don't believe that any opinion is protected from being questioned on the basis of respect. If you want me to respect it, let me question it, and explain to me why it is deserving of respect. Some opinions can be shot down pretty quickly, like, "I think we should bomb a small country for no reason." I could pick that apart for why it's a bad idea. All opinions don't start on equal playing fields.
Anyway, that's enough of a rant for today. Hope all is well for friends and family worldwide.
